I’m a big fan of gut instinct… of using your own common sense to get you through situations – but if you find yourself asking, is my ex stringing me along, this is one of those times where finding the truth can really be taxing!
Just after a breakup is often a time in your life when your brain goes into overdrive asking question after question, wondering what could have gone wrong? What could you have done differently? And so many other questions that seem impossible to answer.
Now all of this is made that much more difficult, if your ex is not being straight with you about what’s going on and how they’re feeling about the relationship. Is my ex stringing me along is a thought that comes about if your ex partner is all over you, trying to get in touch with you one day… then distant and cold the next. You’re the most important person in the world to them… and then they don’t see anything between you other than ‘good friends’.
…So Here’s Where You Can Turn The Tables
Let’s just decide that getting mixed messages from your ex about where you stand is not only confusing, it can be hurtful and just plain cruel of them to not be honest with you and tell you what the situation is… so let’s find out for ourselves 😉
Why Are They Stringing You Along?
The two main reasons for an ex-partner to keep stringing you along is either because they are indecisive and don’t really know what they want, or they’re insecure and need constant reassurance from you that you are still going to be thinking about them (and worse for you – that you could still be a ‘backup plan’ if things don’t work out for them after the breakup), and sometimes a combination of both!
You might also like...
Advice On Getting An Ex Back
In all the time I’ve spent helping couples get back together, I often think "what is the best piece of advice on getting an ex back that I can offer?" ...[continued]
The first thing to remember is that this situation is not your fault. I’ve seen this happen far too many times – where people start to believe that their ex being unclear with them is their fault. Let me reassure you it’s NOT anything you’ve done wrong – you just need to clear things up with them to stop asking yourself, is my ex stringing me along?
Here’s Step One
The main reason your ex will be looking to you just after the breakup is because of your availability to them. Throughout the relationship, whether you realise it or not, you were a shoulder to cry on and the person they trusted the most. BUT! when they gave up the relationship, they also gave up the right to treat you like this! So here is what you need to do right now to start discovering the truth:
Step One – Limit Contact!
Why?! Can I hear you asking? Proving to your ex partner that the situation has changed – you are no longer going to be their shoulder to cry on or their emotional crutch – is a crucial first step you need to take at this point.
Whether your end goal is to reunite the relationship with your ex-partner, or simply just to get the answers to the questions you’re asking yourself (answers which you really do deserve!) – limiting the contact you have them is not only going to throw them and put a dent in this ‘security blanket’ situation they’ve put you in – but it’s really going to shift your value in their minds to much higher place, a place where you can start getting the answers you deserve!
Remember – This Is Only The First Step!
Now, this is only the first step you should take in this situation – it is crucial to make sure you have a complete plan in your mind on what you need to do next – or everything could turn horribly wrong again! To get yourself a detailed plan, no matter what your end goal with your ex, click here now to download our free guide where you can start to figure out just where you stand in their minds and stop asking ‘is my ex stringing me along?’ for good!