The Relationship Archetypes
I was going through a magazine recently and found an article that was very useful for relationships… it was the idea of the ‘roles’ we bring to every relationship we’re in, and how these can be grouped into different archetypes. Now if you’re thinking this doesn’t sound important, these characteristics actually play a huge part in our behavior, and are often the reasons behind many of the successes a relationship has, as well as many of the fights or arguments.
These groups don’t just give you ideas about what you can start to notice and even learn to control within yourself, they can also help you spot certain traits in others and let you know what to expect if you get into a relationship with them. Want to never be flustered or confused by something your partner does or their behavior in general? Understanding their core personality is one of the most important steps behind this 😉
In this post we’re going to take a look at the first group – the ‘head of the household’ if you want to call them that – “The Parent”.
The Head Of The Family
As you can probably tell from the name alone – this group are more the ‘in-control’ type of person in a relationship. In life they are used to looking after everything, and to an extent looking after other people as well, and they often bring these aspects to their relationships.
As well as looking after people, they are often the ones that feel responsible for meeting the needs in the relationship. From planning dates to getting over any problems you’re both having, the parent tries to be the one who makes decisions. But with that often comes a downside:
Who Makes ALL The Decisions?
The need to make decisions or ‘fix’ things in the relationship can lead to “the parent” being very protective of their partner. The fact that they try to choose what happens or even what their partner does makes them feel very needed and important in the relationship. However, as they try to make more and more decisions, they might actually end up trying to decide things for the other person without asking them first!
This is often one of the main causes of arguments between a couple where one person takes on the role of the parent. By making decisions without discussing them together, this can often lead to repetitive fights that eventually wear on the relationship ending in a breakup. So while this protective nature does come from a good place, it often needs to be scaled back to keep the relationship happy and healthy, with a balance between both people involved.
Behavior like this could come from a core fear of losing control, or specifically the relationship getting out of control simply because they weren’t decisive enough at one time. But by trying to control too many things, they often force the other person in the relationship to behave more like a child, by removing their ability to make their own choices. To have a healthier relationship – the parent personality needs to work on letting things go, and giving their partner more control over the relationship and their lives in general.
What To Expect From ‘The Parent’
- Often has a strong head on their shoulders – the responsible person in the relationship who is able to think things through;
- Very caring and often tries their best to use their resources to strengthen the relationship;
- Willing to support their partner and stand up for them when they need help;
- Usually organized and prepared – ready for anything.
- Can attract ‘child-like’ partners they might need to baby-sit;
- Often look to overpower their partner if they feel they’re making a mistake;
- Removing the decision making from their partner can make their partner feel weak – often leading to arguments that could be prevented;
- Being too organized and not flexible – sometimes need to learn how to let things go;
- Being overly cautious could lead to them missing out on some more fun events.
What YOU Have To Be Aware Of If You’re Dating ‘A Parent’:
- They can often try to be bossy and take control of the relationship;
- When putting your points across or when you have something important to say, you’ll have to be more certain and assertive for them to be heard, otherwise they might just be ignored or skimmed over;
- You will often have to work to convince them to do something different or adventurous to overcome any cautious nature.
What ‘A Parent’ Could Do To Improve Their Relationships:
- Let other partner make decisions, and let them face the consequences if these decisions don’t pay off;
- Learn how to let go of smaller choices that don’t need to be agonized over;
- Start to trust their partner more and discuss things before acting;
- Try to be more adventurous, and bring new things into the relationship to add some excitement and grow closer to each other.
Share Your Thoughts!
So there’s an overview of the parent personality type. What do you think? Do you know anyone who matches up with this archetype (maybe even you)? Leave a comment with your thoughts below! 🙂